Equals Love, Does Not Equal Love
by talcumpowder
Summary: Porn can totally be educational. Josh/Metis.


**Pre-Notes:** Apparently, you can't let me get bored in class. English class no less! Metis probably writes Batman fanfic when he's bored in class.**  
Disclaimer:** It would be an epic stick figure comic if I owned it. And not nearly as pretty.**  
Summary:** Porn can totally be educational.  
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= 3, ≠ 3  
"_That's almost cute._"

There were quite a few things that Josh generally did not admit or talk about unless questioned on them. His relationship with Metis, no matter how much he might want to shout it from the rooftops, was one of those things. Metis was sort of paranoid about things like that and Josh knew. Josh respected it. He was sort of paranoid too. It kind of sucked.

But not the good kind of suck like Charles giving Metis a sucker (and Josh knew Charles did things like that on purpose) and Metis just sat there, idly swiping his tongue over it as he—train of thought stopping riiiiiiiiiiight there. That was another thing Josh didn't admit. He spent 85% of his time thinking about Metis (75% of that 85% was dirty), 10% thinking about football and 5% thinking about everything else. Josh had actually calculated.

And all of this was sort of running through his head while he watched Metis sleep. Thing #3 Josh didn't admit: he liked watching Metis sleep. Really, it made him feel like the creepy guy from that one book his twin sisters were always reading. At least he didn't steal his boyfriend's engine . . . Not that Metis had a car anyway, but it was the thought that counted. Not being a somewhat abusive pedo of a boyfriend—and he had tried to explain this to his sisters—was a good thing!

Oh. And he didn't sparkle in the sun. He might be gay, but he wasn't on that level yet. Josh absent-mindedly wondered if that particular kind of vampire had, like, glitter sperm. That would be kind of—

"Josh?"

Josh came back from the land of sparkle-sperm at the sound of Metis' groggy, kind of uncertain voice. He refocused on Metis. Shit. Metis was awake.

"Why were you watching me?"

Uh-oh. Josh knew that voice. That was the "Josh, you're in trouble" voice. It was different from the "Josh, you're a lint-licker" voice or the "Josh, Batman doesn't work like that" voice. Metis had many, many different voices. This was not a good one.

"You're beautiful when you sleep."

The bed shifted slightly. Josh hardly noticed, but then Metis was resting his forehead against Josh's. He was doing that weird thing where he kind of just stared at Josh. Josh had asked why Metis did it once and had only gotten bright laughter and a shake of Metis' head. Charles said Metis did it a lot. It helped him think or something. But Josh thought Metis thought fine, he didn't need—

"You're such a creeper."

"Does that mean you love me?"

"No."

"Then why are you in my bed?"

"This."

Metis tilted his head a little to kiss Josh. It was sweet—Josh thought Metis kissed like a girl. Not that kissing like a girl was a bad thing. Generally, Josh liked the way girls kissed. The texture was different though . . . Cheerleaders were goop and chapstick. Metis licked his lips. They were chapped and rough. This, somehow (god knows how), appeals to Josh. Hell, Metis with garbage-foul breath would probably appeal to Josh. Oh god.

Now he knew what his mother had meant when she said that when you reeeeeeeeeeally loved a person, you'd swap germs with them any day, any where. Here he was, sitting on his bed with a boy that didn't use chapstick. And they were kissing. Damn weird, really. Just—

"I love you, Metis."

Metis smiled, "I love you on alternate Tuesdays and all weekends."

"Does that mean," Josh asked quietly, "that I get Monday through Friday with alternate Tuesdays?"

"Friday is part of the weekend."

"Why do you get the weekends anyway?"

"Because during the school week I need the support of your love to get by."

"But I need your love to get me through football."

"Mmm . . . Fine, I love you all days."

Metis smiled. Yet another thing Josh did not like to admit. Metis-smiles made him melt. Not the gruesome, melting Wicked Witches kind. The heat and chemistry melting chocolate melting. Josh really hoped Metis never noticed. He was running out of secret things he didn't admit publicly.

Though really, girly women's novels—he didn't read them, his mom did—always talked about Trust. And No Secrets, which was a girl-band that his twin sisters had liked once but no longer existed. It wasn't that kind of No Secrets anyways. It was the kind where you told the person you loved absolutely Everything (with a capital E)—including deep, dark secrets. But really, were they ready for that kind of soul-bearing? Would it tear them apart? What if it was so horribly, terribly bad that not even cheesy Batman jokes could save it? Could—

"Did you hear what I just said?"

"Um," Josh paused, hesitant, "no?"

Metis sighed, "I love you Josh, can I take a shower?"

"I love you too, May. Can I come with?"

"No."

Josh was kind of disappointed. He liked taking showers—especially with Metis. Enter thing number 5 that nobody but Metis should know: Metis regularly promised Josh showers for things. It started out as a joke, really, but somehow it had escalated and become a regular thing. Josh looked forward to showers and Metis was denying him one. It made him—

"I actually want to get clean. However," here Metis smirked though not in a Charles-y way, "if you want to make me dirty before I get clean . . ."

Oh. Oh. So that's how it was. Josh placed his hands on Metis' hips, somewhat unsure of how to proceed. He looked up at Metis for some sort of signal, some sort of sign that this was okay. Metis kissed him. It was the sort of kiss you give little kids on their bruises—Metis was kissing the uncertainty away. Josh smiled and kissed back.

Slowly, slowly, ever so slowly the soft, too-big, borrowed flannel pyjama pants slid off. Josh took this all in. Blowjobs in the shower were something entirely different from this. Taking Metis' clothes off himself seemed so much more personal than having him bared like a sacrifice. And maybe it was more embarrassing too. Maybe that (this?) was why they opted for showers and the like. This was tentative—scared, really—as clothes fell to the floor.

Too fast? Too slow? Josh wouldn't really tell. He was topless and Metis was bottomless so maybe it was just wrong altogether. But Metis was beautiful and that was the really important thing. Wasn't it? Josh kissed Metis' neck softly, tenderly . . . He hugged Metis to himself.

"I don't know how this works."

"I don't really know either."

The words simply hung in the air for a long moment and then Metis laughed.

"I probably should've watched that porn Charles sent me. It would've helped."

"Charles sent you porn?"

"Jay did too."

"Joking or serious?"

Josh looked at Metis, suddenly kind of sad he didn't have friends like that. His friends didn't send him porn—err, they didn't send him gay porn anyway. They sent him lots of boobs. And okay, boobs were nice. Didn't help in his current situation, but boobs were nice. Also didn't help when Metis wasn't—

"Both? Charles sent it as a joke. I'm like, 90% sure of that. But Jay was serious, I think. He gave me a lecture on protection before he handed over the porn."

"Did he give you condoms too?"

Metis blushed. Josh could see the blush, even if Metis wasn't looking straight at him. From this, Josh deduced that either Jay had given Metis condoms or Metis had gone out and bought some. It was sort of a common thing, even if Josh wasn't going to admit to either. Not that Jay went around handing out condoms like candy—no, of course not. But uh, if Josh maybe went to go get some condoms then that was entirely his own business and really—

"Eric did."

Josh blinked. Eric didn't seem like the kind of person that would give out condoms to people. Then again, maybe Jay and Eric were plotting together. Maybe Odette or Sarah was plotting to give Metis birth control. Not that guys could get pregnant. At least, not normally.

"Do you still have that porn?"

Metis gave him a weird look. Josh, however, was genuinely curious. He figured if Metis still had it they could watch it together. Or something. If Metis wanted to, of course. Somehow Josh thought that if they worked (watched?) it out together . . . Well, it would be less embarrassing somehow.

"I going to pretend you never ever asked that," Metis says, "okay?"

Josh pouts—even if he'd never admit it—a little, "I'm serious, Metis."

"Why," Metis smirks a little, "do you want it for yourself?"

"I wanna watch it together."

Metis gave him another weird look. Josh was getting used to this.

"We could learn something?"

Metis stared. Josh drummed his fingers on Metis' sides and looked at him sheepishly.

"Josh," Metis said slowly, "if I didn't sleep with you, I would probably hit you for suggesting that. As it is, I still kind of want to hit you for suggesting that. Really. Watch it together."

"It would be educational."

Josh is still drumming his fingers on Metis' sides and Metis hasn't said anything yet so Josh keeps doing it. Metis touches foreheads with Josh again. They stay like that for several seconds before Metis kisses Josh. It's slow and sweet, like the molasses Josh sometimes has.

"Let's go look up porn—oh god. I can't believe I just said that."

Josh laughed, "Okay."

----**  
Postit-Notes:** We're going to pretend like I posted this a long time ago.


End file.
